Life has been tough and hectic lately.
I cannot remember the last moment when I could have enough rest and less work. You know, I am a typical person who finishes my tasks on that day without leaving any 'overnight' work for tomorrow. Unless, it's a huge project which takes more than a day, that is one different story.
October has been tough. At the beginning, I was overwhelmed by many commitments. Reaching the end of October, school workload and expectation has got me. I stay at school for 12++ hours per day. Serotonin booster has been my daily dope. I hope I recover fast from my vertigo. It has been countless sleepless nights.
My final semester has been amazing. The people are smart-badass. Well, who cares about being a decent biomedical student when you're about to leave the school?
Looking back then, I see a decent, discipline and obedient biomedical student of myself. The one who worked hard and gave everything that she had. Now?
It has been rather different- a girl with retro/ street-style attire.
But still, she is determined to leave a hallmark before wearing her graduation gown.
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October- people call it Rocktober. It's the month when people expect it to be fantastic. I used to think the same thing, until I experienced a few disappointments.
Who would expect his/her crush get into a relationship?
Who would love to quarrel with his/her mom?
Who would like to be forgotten on his/her birthday?
Who would want to be a slave of school work?
You know the answers.
I am very tired of adoring my ex-crush secretly. Yet, I love to do it that way. Weird, you might think, but I pray fervently for him. Recently, I totally let go everything unto His loving Hands. In return? One better guy comes to me.
I might be flattered by his words,
but I can choose not to trust so easily.
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Who am I to handle life by myself, Lord?
Even Elijah became suicidal when he forgot to rest in You
Your thoughts are higher than mine
Your wisdom is my guidance
Guide my steps, Lord.
Who am I without You, Abba?
miracles take place in every single day.
Love,
Irene, xxx
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